Crumbling Ginger Bread House.

I just quickly wanted to write about decorating Gingerbread houses with children. I know there are Plenty of creative mamas out there who can build && decorate the most beautiful houses out there, I however am not one of them. Here is my venting session && Tips to help you survive this time old tradition with your children without screaming && throwing the damn thing into the trash.

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First, who the hell came up with this?

Who thought "You know what would be an AMAZING idea?, Lets bake cookies until they're as hard as rocks && build a little house that no one will eat, just for decoration.", I am honestly still trying to figure this out.

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(If you're looking for a history lesson on gingerbread houses go here: https://www.pbs.org/food/the-history-kitchen/history-gingerbread/#:~:text=Gingerbread%20houses%20originated%20in%20Germany,became%20associated%20with%20Christmas%20tradition.) It doesn't state who had that "Great idea" but it is still pretty interesting.

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Anyway, We are here. We are the mom's who are tasked with decorating the Gingerbread house with the kids because we know our husbands or signification others do not have the patience to sit down && do a craft with the kids.

So here are my tips for you:

1) Order or purchase a "Pre-assembled house". You can do this at Walmart,Target,&& Amazon.

2) Buy extra decorating tools,

Cookie icing is a biggie for our family, it doesn't go on too thick && dries faster.

Buy cute little edible characters that your kids will like && want to eat (Put them on last so it still holds your child's interest). Buy little cheap paint brushes for fine details; this helps you && the kids not be covered in icing && you don't get frustrated with the messes that we have to pick up after!.

3) If you are a perfectionist, BUY A SECOND GINGERBREAD HOME && decorate it when the kids are sleeping. Everyone wants to be able to post the perfect little gingerbread home && write "Little so and so and I did this #familygoals #craftychristmas" BUT that just is not realistic in the slightest, because if you and your children are actually having fun whilst making a gingerbread house its going to be messy && just look like a complete train wreck. These. are. facts. people.

4) REMEMBER ITS ABOUT THE KIDS, your kids are just excited to be spending time with you during the chaos of the holiday season! Remember why you're doing it && who Christmas is all about. I know in the past I have been so invested in "Making everything perfect" that I have forgotten to see if my kids are actually happy or not. This year my four year old && I decorated the prefab gingerbread house && honestly it looks so awful BUT he && I actually had a blast making it this year because no one is going to eat it, or probably see it for that matter (at least not in person, Thanks covid.), && we just got to relax && spend time with each other.

This year I have been more in the Christmas spirit than I think ever. This year not being able to see family during the holiday season has made my entire family appreciate what the holiday is actually about && I am so very grateful for that && our ugly "horror-gingerbread house".

I AM JUST PALE!. It's my skin tone.

Something that I'm sure anyone can related to, but especially mamas. Is the constant comments on our skin && overall appearance.

I was in class on Tuesday && had the entire class push out comments about how I looked AT 9 IN THE MORNING. It started with "Chels, you look really tired." Then another person chimed in "Yeah Chelsea, are you feeling okay?" && another "You look really pale, are you sick?" Thank you for the 20 questions but aren't you here to learn about criminology && not about my overall well being. You can't catch what I have, Y'all especially through zoom class.

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There are many key points here my friends. (specific to me)

First: I AM JUST FUCKING PALE, It is literally my skin tone.

Second: I am a mom of two small children who have not let me get more than four hours of sleep in the past 3 days.... or since I have had them for that matter... Also my husband snores like a bear.

Third: My hair is disheveled because I am growing it out, I can not tame that so leave me be.

Fourth: I am drinking a coffee out of a mug that states I am a mom && wearing a shirt that literally says I worship caffeine. It fuels me since sleep is no longer an option.

Fifth: I made it to class on time, That's a feat in itself.

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Also, when a bunch of people are asking you why you look so awful, it does not make a person feel so good. I felt like shit this morning I've been super stressed out, Recently a member of my family tested positive for covid (which I am so nervous for him since he is a little guy.), So naturally we (The Merrill Clan, which is what the nurse at the covid tent referred to us as) went && got tested. Then because of this we had to cancel all of our upcoming events until we know for sure that we do not have the virus. Do you know how hard it is to tell your toddler that all the fun parties for Christmas are cancelled? Please imagine my little Wyatt reacting to "We cant see anyone for Christmas" nicely then throw that entire day dream on fire && add demonic screaming. Also next week is the start of finals for me, College is hard enough without everyone telling me how sick I look, but now I have to run on fumes && pray that I make it to my destination of next semester.

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I guess the big take away from this little vent session is

Please be nice to people! Appearances are not everything, they are just the surface to a huge iceberg under the water && comments that are not helpful are the titanic crashing into us.

If you want to show concern for a mama who looks sick of tired here's some things you can ask:

1) Instead of "Are you feeling okay?" Say "How's everything going?" Taking an interest in the things that our stressing us out it more helpful then just asking how we are feeling because as moms we are most likely going to lie and say "I am fine" when in all reality we are not "Fine"

2) Next ask us "Have you been taking time for yourself?, OR "Have you had a break lately?" in place of "You look pale, are you sick?" Most of us do not have time to take care of our skin let alone go tanning, && during the winter you get pale. Ask us what we would do if we could take a break && if you're actually concerned enough go ahead && plan it out for us. Sometimes moms need to be cared for too, we literally spend all of our time worried about our families && not nearly enough time worrying about ourselves.

3) Lastly, do NOT be afraid to ask us if we need help. Most of the moms I know will not voluntarily say "I need help/I need a break for myself" I AM ONE OF THEM. It's hard for us moms to step back && assess how we are actually doing. Sometimes we relay on the friends && family who are there for us to say "Hey, you're running on Empty lets go do something." Or "You need to take a break". Normally we see this from our family A LOT when our babies are first born with the offers to watch the baby so you can sleep or get things done around the house but it fades off within the first year. It is always nice when someone else takes care of us just by hanging out, or taking us away from ALL the chaos we see everyday.

If you are the support system for a mama who is clearly struggling I DARE YOU, to do just one of these things && see how drastically their mood changes. You may very well make their day just by being concerned && Present.

The stockings were hung with care...

Okay, So Christmas is fucking stressful when YOU ARE SANTA CLAUS.

So I came up with a brilliant idea.... or so I thought. Mommy "helps" Santa with the stockings and that why they are done early (& I only have 700 things to do on Christmas eve) .. && that worked great last year while Wyatt could not reach the stockings, but this year Wyatt has been very very naughty.

He has invaded all the cabinets in the kitchen that we store snacks in, he has figured out our other hiding spots for snacks, indulged in some ice cream sandwiches for breakfast, && has started to grab things out of his stocking before Christmas....

Gosh darnit kid, That's not how you get your butt on the nice list!

So, Now his stocking is hung up higher than every single one of ours so he can NOT get to them before the "big show". Also we had to buy a lock for the fridge && freezer so Wyatt can not eat chocolate && snacks for breakfast. Which is actually beneficial for me too because it keeps me from eating all the snacks too!

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So moral of the story, don't try to cut corners && do anything early because toddlers are equally as mischievous as elves && will find a way to make your great idea && early work into difficult more taxing work.